“Here’s a picture of us all very very tired in front of the Arc de Triomphe. Here’s one of my American niece talking in front on the Pont Neuf. She needs braces. Here’s another one of her talking… Oh here’s a good one of us tired in front of the L'église de la Madeleine. The youngest was just getting the flu. Here’s a particularly singular statue of… just before…”
He looked down and caught their expressions.
"No. You don't," he said, almost to himself. "Okay. Alright girls. 'Fat' might not be a polite word, but it’s honest." He inhaled quickly and exhaled with equal vigor. "Anyway... imagine if Big Ed strode into your house and said your house was his now, and he took control of the remote control for your television with its forty-nine channels? (Or however many it has),” he said, then added, hissing, “Wouldn’t let you even touch it!” He tried not to blink as he looked down at them.
Here’s a list of the amazing new French words and expressions he accumulated over their stay in Paris. (AKA his list of ailments or things he needed to tell a doctor):